Sometimes I like to make simple food, and sometimes I make recipes that leave my peers questioning my sanity (and social life).
When I tell text them I’m making such-and-such recipe—last week, squashducken; week before that, 8-page-recipe meatloaf—responses generally contain one or more of the following:
-omg
-omfg
-wtf
-whatttt
-whoaaah
-!!!!
-?!
-?!!!!
-. . . ?
-amazing
-ahhmazing
-[bug eye emoji]
-holy [expletive]
The recipes range from “why haven’t I done this forever?” ridiculous-good to “who would do this to themselves?”—and yet still ridiculous-good.
Either way, there’s no trumping these recipes—no improving upon, no besting, no waxing poetic. It’s game over, roll the credits. And perfect your mic drop technique:
Here are the dishes that we pretend broke the internet, but really just make us happy:
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There are four pounds of cherries.
Imagine a chicken pot pie where every bite has a significant amount of crust. This is that pie.
The bottom gets griddled. And you stick an egg in a bagel hole. What other questions do you have?
Hello these are deep-fried.
It’s like turducken but for dessert.
A squash in a squash in a squash in a squash in a squash in a squash.
Three heads of kale, three cups of heavy cream, one dish.
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You spread butter and sugar over the matzo before it even meets chocolate.
There’s no crust, but there is 1 1/2 pounds of pasta in the shape of a deep-dish pie.
Graham crackers but in cake form.
Put one stick of salted butter in this ice cream. Do it.
Cronuts are the default answer for “best mashup food.” The real answer is this monkey bread, pull-apart bread, and scone hybrid.
A can of Campbell’s tomato soup turns into cake—it’s good, not a dare.
Okay, there’s more. We can’t help ourselves—call us nutty, or genius.
