An Anti-Valentine’s Day Party

Food52’s Managing Editor Brette Warshaw is throwing no-stress weeknight parties for anyone, anytime, and (almost) every kitchen. You’re invited.

Today: Freedom tastes so good. Here’s how to celebrate it.

If you’re single on the evening of Valentine’s Day, I think you’re going to want to eat a lot of pork with your hands.

That’s right, this Valentine’s Day, us single people are going cavemen (and women). We’re grabbing giant utensils — tongs, cleavers, steak knives, and the like — and we’re going to grab at giant hunks of meat with them. And then, we’re going to eat cornbread and unhealthy greens and chocolate cake with it, and we’re going to love every second of it.

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Because what’s a better way to celebrate freedom than eating whatever you damn well choose? And then finishing off a beer-y, bacon-y dinner with a thing called Dump-It Cake, and toasting all the exes who treated us like it?

I bet you’ll be happy to curl up and keep your clothes on after this meal. Happy Anti-Valentine’s Day!

The Menu

Salad with Green Goddess Dressing
Matilda, Maple & Garlic Pork Shoulder with Crispy Skin
Avocado Cornbread
Beer and Bacon Braised Collard Greens
Chocolate Dump-It Cake

The Plan

Up to two nights before: Make your Dump-It Cake, and store it in the fridge. Trust me — it’s even better cold.

The night before: Bake your Avocado Cornbread. Get that pork in the oven; it will cook all night, and then all day. 

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When you get home from work: Prep your collard greens. Make your Green Goddess Dressing.  

About an hour before your guests arrive: Start braising those greens. If they’re done before you’re ready to eat, take them off the heat but keep them on the stove; you’ll just reheat before serving. 

Dinner time: If you haven’t yet, crisp up your pork skin. Toss your dressing. Warm up your cornbread. Dinner is served!

When the right moment comes: Bring out the cake, with vanilla ice cream. Give everyone forks. Dig in.